Hurting

…Again and again…because those

I care for best, do me

Most harm…

 - Sappho

Yes. I'm still hurting. I'm still hurting because I still care. Do people really expect me to just move on like that? To just not think about it? Why can't they understand that the last thing I need would be happy banter. The last think I need would be people making fun of things they barely give time to comprehend.

Yeah. For awhile, I'll be the bad vibe in every party.

It's not like I want to be the party pooper. Do they honestly think that I like crying myself to sleep?




~

I was looking for something in my room today and I stumbled upon this letter I wrote to him a few months back. I was in this retreat of sorts and we were asked to write a letter to someone we deemed worthy together with a letter to God. I couldn't even look at it. I shred it to pieces and threw it straight into the bin while trying not to cry.

It still hurts... so much.

-Someone Anxious.