Patterns.

I can never live with this that's why I never choose you...

Some patterns I can never really stomach. Some cycles are just too much for me to live out. I've come to realize that you and her have this love - hate thing going on and when you say it is finally over, it never really is. My advice: Man up and stick with your decision (possibly honor hers).

I know it is hurtful to say but if you were coddled a bit more, I honestly think you'll turn into fluff. Life is not always filled with drama. You are not a prince on a white horse nor are you the guy next door out to rule the world. I've come to realize that it won't take you a new environment (be it school, work or another country) to make you grow up. No matter how much you try and force yourself, if you keep acting like this boy who thinks everyone will be there for you, you'll still be immature about (almost) everything.

Life is what you make it and not what others give you. If you live a life out of fear because you might regret everything in the future than you don't live at all. Then again, who am I to judge? I'm also a love sick puppy when it comes to him so I can't really throw things at you for being such.

The thing is... I've come to accept that there will be no happy ending for me. I don't think you really have. I've come to accept that loneliness is a state of mind and that whatever we do we love not to be loved but because we are selfless. Yes, to be loved... what more could we ask for? We could ask to be selfless and just love.